Day two of the 2nd Congress of the International Positive Psychology Association was simply amazing. I learned SO much! At one point I laughed to my friend “Teacher! My brain is full!” Here’s a report of the day’s events:
It began with Ed Deci speaking about self-determination and its relationship to positive psychology – in other words: the self-fulfilling prophecy. He showed scientific proof that believing that you are doomed and things will never get better can actually bring that about. Using a simple analogy (of my own), if one is drowning and they really don’t think anyone will come to rescue them, they can behave based on this belief by not paddling and dying before help could arrive. But Deci really wowed the crowd when he reported that studies repeatedly proved that external rewards kill off intrinsic motivation. For instance, when we try to control our children either by giving them a reward for doing well (the carrot) or punishing them when they do not do well (the stick), we inadvertently are hindering our child’s innate love of learning! You can bet I will be blogging more about this.Continue reading »
It is very late (1:30am here in Philadelphia) so today’s report will probably be fairly short, but I have SO many exciting things to share with you! Today was the first day of the 2nd Congress of the International Positive Psychology Association. I was SO excited as I entered the downtown Marriott for the first time. I saw a sign directing me up…. up…. (and away!) Once in the right place, registration was a snap. I was handed my IPPA bag and envelope (I felt like Charlie from Willie Wonka and the Chocolate Factory).
One great surprise is that tomorrow (Sunday, July 24th) the IPPA is holding Special Interest Groups (SIGs) during the lunch hour. There were several to choose from but I must say that I was happily shocked to see that Barbara Fredrickson will be hosting one of these SIGs. She is the author of Positivity, which is my second highest recommended book (next to Sonja Lyubomirsky’s book, The How of Happiness). She will be talking on Monday and will be closing out the conference with Richard Davidson on Tuesday, but to get Barbara in small venue is quite a treat!Continue reading »
When it comes to suicide, Utah currently ranks #9. In an effort to save lives and lower the rate of suicide in Utah, Happiness 101 will offer a webinar to reach out to the rural areas of the state where suicide is the most prevalent. The online class will be completely free. There will be no prescreening. Classes will be held on Wednesdays from 7-9pm from October 5th to November 9th.
Happiness 101 is an uplifting class where you will learn HOW to be happy, build a support system, and learn to break unhappy habits. Most people believe the myths of Happiness and therefore spend a great deal of energy chasing it, only to end up disappointed. Scientific research has now revealed the things that actually bring us Happiness. Even better: you can start being Happier NOW.Continue reading »
Published on KSL
Let me start by saying a person should never, never, never go off their medications without talking to their prescriber. It is dangerous and potentially lethal.
According to the Behavioral Risk-Factor Surveillance System, Utah is currently the happiest state in the union. It is also one of the saddest. Utah sits right in the middle of the “suicide belt,” which stretches along the Rocky Mountains from Wyoming and Idaho, through Utah and Nevada and down to Arizona and New Mexico. As of 2008, the mortality rates gathered from the U.S. census indicated that Utah ranked ninth in the nation for suicides. In September 2010, the Utah Department of Health declared that Utah was the fourth greatest consumer of antidepressants in the nation with 12.71 percent of residents being prescribed antidepressants.
The problem is that these medications do not work on most of the consumers to whom they are prescribed.Continue reading »
On April 4th, 2010, I had the pleasure of screening Lisa Cypers Kamen‘s documentary, The H-Factor at the Happiness Social. Though Kafeneio Coffeehouse is a big place, few seats were empty when the lights went down. There were 52 people there, hungry to learn even more about Happiness. They were well fed.
By Lisa’s account, The H-Factor is still a rough cut, the documentary packs a wallop. Weighing in just over 30 minutes in length Lisa interviews the homeless, celebrities, prisoners and Happiness experts covering what Happiness is and is not, why we are not as happy as we think we should be and most importantly, specific ways one can be Happier. I enjoyed the perspective from which she shot the film – that of her 9 year old daughter, Kayla. Together they traveled the world in search of the elusive, rare creature known as Happiness, only to find, like Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz, that it was with them the whole time.Continue reading »
Lisa Cypers Kamen is a mover and shaker in the world of Positive Psychology. She has travelled all over the world, speaking and collaborating with like-minded people and screening her documentary, the H-Factor. Now Lisa is coming to Salt Lake City and she is going to bring her film to us. After the movie, she will give you an chance to ask questions and learn more about Happiness!.
This is a very special event. I am asking YOU to RSVP right now on Facebook or MeetUp to join us at 7pm on Monday, April 4th for the Happiness Social featuring Lisa Cypers Kamen.
You know, my wife is truly amazing. Being with her helps me to see the world in a different way. So, here I am, The Happy Therapist, going into Harmon’s Grocery Store (the one on 33rd South near Bangerter Highway) in search of an appetizer our monthly dinner with friends. Not far inside the store is, what I call, the “cheese island” – that donut shaped kiosk where they sell all the special cheeses (and some meats). I honestly thought the blokes behind those particular counters were just there to answer a few simple questions, like “Where’s the brie?” Little did I know that Danny was a fountain of culinary knowledge. I probably would have gone right on thinking that too – if it were not for my wife. She took a salami sample and began asking Danny very intelligent questions, such as what was so special about the salami that made it more expensive. Danny poured forth this knowledge about the salami, giving us a first hand account of his conversation with its local maker – complete with how he immigrated from Europe and struggled to get the appropriate authorities to give him a liquor license (though the man would not be serving alcohol) that he may make his salami in just the right manner. Further, in the 20 minutes we spent with Danny he educated us about cheese (and where it gets it’s flavor) and what wine goes best with what dish. Danny was mindful about pushing unwanted knowledge on my wife but with a genuine curiosity and thirst for knowledge, she asked more questions, drinking deeply from the fountain of knowledge.
As I watched my wife talking to Danny, I realized that all of us want to be useful. All of us want to feel like we have something special to give. I educate about Happiness. Danny educates about cheese. I love teaching Happiness 101. It fulfills a special place inside of me that has a something exciting to share and without another (genuinely interested) person to share that knowledge with, I think it would feel like being thirsty but never being able to quench that thirst. So, I believe it is for Danny. He knows as much about cheese as I know about Happiness. My wife took the time to stop and not merely SEEM interested or get her needed information and be on her way, but a true interest. I think that made Danny feel very good. I might even go so far as to say it might have made his day. ‘Much as it makes my day (or my week) to teach the science of Happiness to people who are hungry for it.
I tell you this story because I hope you will remember that people in your life want to be heard – REALLY heard. Not just a token effort. Think about it. Have you REALLY listened to your spouse lately? Do you know what’s in their heart? How about your children? Do you know what they are worried about? Did you listen to your friend the last time you met – or did you merely wait your turn to talk so you could talk about what’s going on with you? What about your parents? There’s a line in a song by Mike and the Mechanics called “The Living Years” – “You can listen as well as you hear.” Please. LISTEN. TODAY.
It was a BIG newsletter this month. There is a LOT going on!
The subject was: Happiness for Prisoners, Professionals and the Deaf Community
The opening paragraph reads:
“There is PLENTY going on in this issue, including Happiness coming to internet radio, a possible documentary and Happiness 101 goes to prison! Yes, lots going on but I do still have slots for new clients. So, if you (or someone you know) want to be happier, contact the Happy Therapist. Thank you so much for all your words of encouragement, good wishes and positivity.
~Frank”
If you would like to subscribe to the newsletter, click here.
For a long time I have wanted to bring the good news about Happiness to the rural areas. Now I can do it via the internet. Beginning Wednesday, February 9th, at 9am, I will be hosting a weekly half-hour talk show called The Happiness Boost on Blog Talk Radio. In this show I will discuss the myths of Happiness and give scientifically proven methods to be Happier. You will also have an opportunity call in with questions and share your positives.
The call-in phone number is 213-559-8006. Click here to sign up.
I recently spent several days with someone (who shall remain nameless). I noticed that many times when something did not go her way, she said “Of course”. She only uttered these two words but her tone and inflection implied “Of course it didn’t go my way. That’s just my luck!” If one has a belief that they are jinxed or unlucky, then it is easy to see proof of this belief where ever one goes. We usually magnify incidents that support our belief and minimize events that run contrary to that belief. In this example, any thing big or small that supported her belief that she was born beneath an unlucky star, she notices quickly and even reinforces her negative belief with her words: “Of course”. However, if something good were to happen, she would might say something like “I don’t believe it!”, “That never happens to me” or “Even a broken clock is write twice a day.” I am sure she is not aware that she is minimizing and maximizing to validate her belief system. I am equally sure that she has not consciously taken out her belief system, held up to the light of scrutiny and asked, “Is this REALLY true?”, “Is this what I really believe?” or “Is this belief serving me?” And that’s how people usually operate. Though our belief is a choice, it is often one we overlook. We make decisions (big and small) based on the belief assumptions without question – until something comes along that is big enough to jar us loose from autopilot to question that unchecked belief. That “something” might be as subtle as an article. Maybe even THIS article.
So, what unchecked beliefs are YOU operating on?
Do you think you’re unlucky? Do you think God is against you? Do you think that deep down you’re no good or unlovable? Do you think most people will take advantage of you if they can?
I invite you to think about it. Scrutinize it. If it’s not working for you, you might consider changing it. After all, you are the architect of your life.
