Happiness » Salt Lake Mental Health

Review of The H-Factor, a Documentary by Lisa Cypers Kamen

Apr 092011

Click here to see the trailer

On April 4th, 2010, I had the pleasure of screening Lisa Cypers Kamen‘s documentary, The H-Factor at the Happiness Social. Though Kafeneio Coffeehouse is a big place, few seats were empty when the lights went down. There were 52 people there, hungry to learn even more about Happiness. They were well fed.

By Lisa’s account, The H-Factor is still a rough cut, the documentary packs a wallop. Weighing in just over 30 minutes in length Lisa interviews the homeless, celebrities, prisoners and Happiness experts covering what Happiness is and is not, why we are not as happy as we think we should be and most importantly, specific ways one can be Happier. I enjoyed the perspective from which she shot the film – that of her 9 year old daughter, Kayla. Together they traveled the world in search of the elusive, rare creature known as Happiness, only to find, like Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz, that it was with them the whole time. Continue reading »

Lisa Cypers Kamen is Coming to the Happiness Social!

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Mar 262011

Lisa Cypers Kamen is coming to the Happiness Social!

Lisa Cypers Kamen

Psychologist and Documentary Film-Maker, Lisa Cypers Kamen is coming to town to screen her documentary, The H-Factor at the Happiness Social on April 4th.

Lisa Cypers Kamen is a mover and shaker in the world of Positive Psychology. She has travelled all over the world, speaking and collaborating with like-minded people and screening her documentary, the H-Factor. Now Lisa is coming to Salt Lake City and she is going to bring her film to us. After the movie, she will give you an chance to ask questions and learn more about Happiness!.

This is a very special event. I am asking YOU to RSVP right now on Facebook or MeetUp to join us at 7pm on Monday, April 4th for the Happiness Social featuring Lisa Cypers Kamen.

Location: Kafeneio Coffeehouse, 258 West 3300 South, Salt Lake City (click here for map)
Date: April 4th, 2010
Time: 7-9pm

Positive #1: Elliott Yamin’s “Free”

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Feb 052011

What an amazing, uplifting song. The melody lifts my spirits and the words inspire me to be the best me I can be. What an amazing voice.

Positive #5: “One person can make a difference” video

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Feb 042011

My wife is so cool. She always knows where the positive, inspiring and amazing stuff is. Today she shared this video with me. It is a great reminder to all of us not to be complacent; to get off our “but” and make a positive difference.

Positive #4: My daughter is alive and safe tonight

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Feb 042011

My wife has been watching a show about a girl who was abducted, raped and murdered. I can’t imagine what that family has gone through, but it prompted me to think of my daughter and how tonight she is safe and alive. I love my daughter so much. I remember the day she was born and I am just so proud of her. Not because of what she does, but because of who she is.
~Frank

Positive #3: Cup O Noodles

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Feb 042011

Say what you want about Cup O Noodles – but I love ‘em! I enjoy them often at my office. It’s cheap. It’s easy. It’s quick AND it’s tasty. They keep me going during a busy day. It even has vegetables in it. Good stuff!

Positive #2 – Alexis

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Feb 042011

Today I hired an administrative assistant. Her name is Alexis. I am very, very excited about not only having someone to help me with the paperwork but also getting more organized and streamlining my business. Alexis is everything I could hope for in an assistant. She is fun, smart, innovative, organized and just a bit of OCD. I am very excited about working with her. Maybe you’ll be lucky enough to meet her one day
~Frank

Doomed

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Jan 302011

I recently spent several days with someone (who shall remain nameless). I noticed that many times when something did not go her way, she said “Of course”. She only uttered these two words but her tone and inflection implied “Of course it didn’t go my way. That’s just my luck!” If one has a belief that they are jinxed or unlucky, then it is easy to see proof of this belief where ever one goes. We usually magnify incidents that support our belief and minimize events that run contrary to that belief. In this example, any thing big or small that supported her belief that she was born beneath an unlucky star, she notices quickly and even reinforces her negative belief with her words: “Of course”. However, if something good were to happen, she would might say something like “I don’t believe it!”, “That never happens to me” or “Even a broken clock is write twice a day.” I am sure she is not aware that she is minimizing and maximizing to validate her belief system. I am equally sure that she has not consciously taken out her belief system, held up to the light of scrutiny and asked, “Is this REALLY true?”, “Is this what I really believe?” or “Is this belief serving me?” And that’s how people usually operate. Though our belief is a choice, it is often one we overlook. We make decisions (big and small) based on the belief assumptions without question – until something comes along that is big enough to jar us loose from autopilot to question that unchecked belief. That “something” might be as subtle as an article. Maybe even THIS article.
So, what unchecked beliefs are YOU operating on?
Do you think you’re unlucky? Do you think God is against you? Do you think that deep down you’re no good or unlovable? Do you think most people will take advantage of you if they can?
I invite you to think about it. Scrutinize it. If it’s not working for you, you might consider changing it. After all, you are the architect of your life.

Frank Clayton, LPC

1000 Awesome Things

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Jan 092011

Click to get the book

Neil Pasricha is a regular bloke much like you and me. He’s had his ups. He’s had his downs. During a particularly rough patch of downs he found himself grasping to find a few right things in his life. He found that though his heart ached, he was able to fine many “Awesome” things all around him. In fact, the more he looked, the more he saw. In an effort to start focusing on the positive, he started a blog called 1000 Awesome Things. He did not expect it to go anywhere. In fact for a long time his only subscriber was his own mother. But he kept focusing on and writing about the positives. Soon, he doubled his number of subscribers – his father also subscribed to his blog. Evidently his father knew a lot of people because Neil’s blog started gaining more and more views – into the millions. In fact, without applying, he won an award for the most popular blog in the world! Not long after, he was contacted by a literary agent and commissioned to write a book. “The Book of Awesome” was #1 on the international bestseller list for THIRTY weeks! In his Ted video he says that when the hard times come, you have two choices: you can wallow in your misery or you can grieve and learn and move on with your life. I wanted to share his story because it is a great example of what I teach in Happiness 101: no matter what life throws at you, you always have a choice.

Setting Your New Year’s Resolution

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Jan 022011

If you’re like most people, you just made a New Year’s Resolution.
If you’re like most people, by March your resolution will be a thing of the past and your confidence in your ability to stick to your goals will have slipped another notch.
It’s a shame. It’s especially a shame because the we have so little control over things in the world. But we DO have control over our behaviors; such as our ability to make a goal and stick with a it. A loss of confidence is a loss of hope.
Why do people fail to accomplish their goal year after a year?
They failed to make their goal a habit.
By making a New Year’s Resolution, you are making a LIFE CHANGE. A life change requires a change of HABIT.

Here is a brief exercise to help you “get” the significance of this change.
Fold your arms. PLEASE, actually DO this right now. Don’t just read through this.
No, I’m serious. Please fold your arms.
Great! Thank you.
Now, fold your arms the other way – a way you do not normally fold your arms.
Now, before you continue I ask that you think of 4-5 words you would use to describe how you feel (with your arms folded the “wrong” way).
You probably came up with words like “awkward”, “weird”, “unnatural”, “uncomfortable” or even “wrong”.
Honestly, is there a “right” way or a “right” way to fold your arms? No. There is just different. If I asked you to fold your arms the new way several times a day over the next month, the new way would eventually become comfortable. This is an important thing to know as you are making your life change: discomfort is not necessarily a bad thing. It can even be feedback to you that you are on the right track; feedback that you are doing something different – you are changing your life.
So, how do you successfully fold your arms a new way? How do you keep your New Year’s Resolution?

Let’s start with the essential: the bullet points of creating a good goal.
A good goal needs to have a time frame.
It should be measurable. This also means that you also need to know your baseline.
It should be do-able.
Try to use positive language.
Your goal should be something YOU can control.
For more detail, click here.

For specific tips, click here.

Frank Clayton, Licensed Professional Counselor