Pop Quiz:
Are you happier at work or at home?
What IS happiness?
True or False: People are either born happy or they’re not
How many times a day does the average person complain?
How many negative thoughts does the average person have per day?
What would truly make you happy?
Studies have shown over and over that people are poor at predicting what will REALLY make them Happy. For instance, most people say they would rather be at home than at work and look forward to the weekend. However, studies have shown that in actuality people are happier at work because they are being productive where at home they just watch TV. So, when tested they discovered they are actually happier at work!
Many people feel that they should be happier than they are and on some level think that happy people were just naturally born that way and they must just be missing the magic gene, thereby preventing them from being happy. While there is a natural Happiness Setpoint and some people ARE naturally predisposed to be happy, happiness truly depends on ones attitude, thoughts and behaviors. In other words, your happiness is in YOUR hands. For example, the average person has 45,000 negatie thoughts per day and complains 70 times per day! When something is being done that often, it is a HABIT. Becoming aware of and changing these unhappy habits is crucial to becoming happier.
In Happiness 101 we address these negative habits and work together to replace them with habits that will improve your life and TRULY help you to be happier. Many people believe it is the big milestones in life that will make them happy: hitting the lottery, finding Mr. or Mrs. Right or getting their dream job or promotion. It is actually the little day-to-day things that bring true happiness.
A professor at Harvard taught a class about Happiness. It turned out to be THE largest class ever attended in its history. You need not relocate to Harvard to learn about it. Happiness 101 is right here in Salt Lake City and the class is FREE! Join us on Monday, November 2nd at 7pm at my office: 220 East 3900 South #7, Salt Lake City. For recorded information call 801-262-0317 You have nothing to lose but your frown.
Frank Clayton
Licensed Professional Counselor
I ask you to ask yourself, “What IS “Mental Illness” anyway?” Depression has been called the “common cold” of mental illness. Statistically you have a better chance of experiencing depression at some point in your life than not. Yet depressed people still hide their Prozac due to the stigma of mental illness. But if every body’s got it, why does the stigma remain? Answer: BECAUSE we continue to hide it. If everyone “came out” about depression, we would likely be relieved to discover we are not only not alone but that the minority is the people who have NOT been depressed. So the various levels of depression have been outlined in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders Fourth Edition (DSM-IV) – does that mean anyone diagnosed with depression is “mentally ill”? There are plenty of diagnosis in the DSM-IV that would hardly seem so including Nicotine Dependence, Caffeine-Induced Anxiety Disorder and Primary Insomnia – to name just a few. Most people could be diagnosed with some thing at any given time. So where is the line of “mental illness”? Careful how you answer. If your answer indicates it’s all-or-nothing you might have a case of “stinkin’ thinkin’” and be diagnosed with Cognitive Disorder (not otherwise specified). Or if you don’t answer all, you might be diagnosed with Oppositional Defiant Disorder or perhaps a communication disorder (depending on your body language). 
In her book, The How of Happiness, Dr. Sonja Lyubomirsky offers twelve different Happiness Habits. These are essentially things you can do in your life that will increase your Happiness. One of these she calls “Flow Experiences”. What she means are those activities in which you forget about time and become completely engrossed in the activity. Examples might be painting, writing, talking, playing chess, woodworking, fishing or praying. These are just a few examples of “Flow Experiences”. I’m sure you have at least a few such experiences of your own that are probably not on this short list of examples. Feel free to respond to this entry with activities that get YOU into the flow. 
I would like to clear up a potential misunderstanding about “all this happiness stuff”. Yes, I am teaching Happiness 101 weekly. Yes, I am a mental health therapist specializing in Happiness. We definately strive to be Happy but you were born with a wide range of emotions, including sadness and anger. There are times when these emotions are very appropriate and should be felt. For instance, if someone just died and you were smiling broadly brushing it off as “just a part of life”, this would be a concern. There are expected “stages” of grief – sadness and anger to name a couple. So, trying to rush through the process to hurry up and be Happy may actually be counter-productive to your overall mental health. I’m not suggesting you wallow in it. Some professionals (myself included) recommend setting aside some time each day to feel your feelings or at least check in with yourself to make sure you are feeling what you are really feeling. So, yes, please do paint with the color of Happiness but my hope is that you won’t categorically dismiss all other feelings as negative – they have their place too.
